It really doesn't concern me and it still really bothers me. I guess I'm pretty ungrateful and I take people for granted. Maybe I should have taken more pictures or something, treasured the moment more. I know that everything is completely off-kilter and strange now, and its probably been that way for a while. It's easy to say that its just how things turned out, and so now its normal, but something about this bothers me. I still can't let this go.
I keep telling myself that I shouldn't think so hard about something that doesn't have anything to do with me. Whatever there was, its gone or completely changed, and this is none of my business. I know, I know, but at the same time I can't help but want to do something. I know I can't fix it. I don't even think its fixable. I can't tell if its broken, or just pulled a disappearing act on me.
So confused, but at the same time so full of regrets. There was never a "perfect moment," and there usually never is. There were many good ones though, good memories and I thought that it would go on for a while. Its funny now that I think about it. I took this for granted and at the same timeI really thought it was something really precious, something that would last not forever, but a very long time. Strange how fast it faded.
I don't know anymore. Its not that this was very sudden, I was the one who suddenly realized that so much has changed. I guess now it doesn't matter how late I realized. I'm afraid that its still too late.